DAY 18-19.. SWING WHEN YOU'RE WINNING

Self Preservation Society Tour........day 18 & 19 Sitrep

Day 18

On waking this morning we could see one small cloud out at sea, towards the horizon, so became concerned it may rain. Chill out day was declared and Parker Jon went down to the beach to Tan his hide, whilst I chilled out at the van with some music.

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However, prior to Parker Jon's departure, we were sat at the van when it was noticed that the German Lady in the next pitch next to us (about 50 and looking healthy!), was casually stripping off all her cloths in full view of ourselves. Just to give that some perspective, her tent window was approximately 2 meters from us. Being gentlemen, Parker Jon and I wiggled our chairs as to obtain the perfect line of sight and so started a 5 minute dramatic undressing which was all orchestrated by the lady's husband.... who was stood next to her, watching us, watching his wife!

To be fair, art can be like that though, random and fleeting............ so we just sat and appreciated the aesthetic Beaty of the female frame, contrasting against the regimented lines of the tent window. And just to be sure we hadn't missed anything we enjoyed an encore at 5pm that night when they repeated the whole show, with original cast, but the husband went balls out as well.

Swingers.......you gotta luv em ;)

Met a lad called joules who was an ex donkey walloper (life guards) and went out for a few beers with him that night. Stayed local having learnt our lessons the night before. Had a good crack. Got back in about 3 ish and could hear the German lady moaning away, presumably about the noise we were making....at least I think thats what it was?

Day 19

Treated to another show from the German couple this morning but we had anticipated this and set our table up in the correct spot, invited joules over to enjoy the festivities and charged 5 Euro's a seat for anyone else interested. Don't know why but I really fancied a McDonald's afterwards?

  "Ethel'

"Ethel'

Packed up and headed to Nice in preparation for Monday nights game against Iceland. Plotted a campsite into the satnav and hit the road. Parker Jon did the driving as I was man down in the back trying to schlaff. Arrived at the campsite to be met by 'Strumbahnfurher Ethel Gurgletoft', who was manning the front desk and has a face that is incapable of smiling. If this woman wasn't a guard a some extermination camp 70 years ago, I would be very surprised. Having just spent 4 days on a 5 star resort, this place is more in the budget range. No luxury motor homes here, just caravans that look like they were sold by Derek Trotter.

Spent most of the afternoon asleep then watched the footie. Fair play to Wales but you need to get your own song you thieving bastards. Well done the Poles (the Polish guys predict an England Poland final and that we would all drowned in vodka). Portugal were lucky and are a 1 man team at the moment, BUT they are still in the mix....will England still be there after tomorrow??

Onwards...